Diary of 40-year-old woman（五）

Night sleep

2010.2.7 Sun Yin


Last night, they have the very wholeness of sleep. Sleep at night, almost became my normal state.
Woke up at four o'clock this morning, confused for a while, five points up reading. I urge the brain clock waking, after the scroll is Gudeng. I immersed the book, forget time.
Still dark night of sleep, surrounded by silent, many people are still doing sweet dreams. I envy people who soundly dreams can take a nap Shuidaotianliang, and I have no such blessings. I often sleep for their own poor and distressed, the day is a trance, limbs foam, lack of energy.
Numerous dark night, I toss and turn, unable to sleep. Each at this time, his thoughts run wild as not to contain the heart of the wilderness, the vertical and horizontal Chi Ben, until, exhausted after me.
Remember, came from the winter, the number of days, I always have a very shallow very shallow sleep. Some rain, wind Xiao, TWO cock, be able to gently wake me from sleep, and then can not sleep long. This time, I more find someone to talk to, and around, my husband's snoring sound, one after another.
I can not wake him.
Into a transparent age, even if full of friends, still full of loneliness; even the closest people around, and sometimes it makes us feel distant soul.
What a lonely heart!
Dark night wakes, the huge night, no one to listen to the call of my soul. Whenever such a moment, I wanted to put into words, the voice of my heart, gently tell the sky and the earth, let them know my bitter and lonely.
The lonely Lanna the night, only my heavy breathing, the ups and downs.
Thought had gone through the road, think of the green time, remember the days of dull, mind helplessness and sigh. Heart, hesitated and looked confused.
Some people say: eat well, wear well and do not tell you to worry about national affairs, how could not sleep? I can not explain. I only know that my heart there is a spirit of grass land, that was my day and night worship of the temple.
I am seeking the truth and purity of life, whether it is close to relatives and friends, or those passing the sage sages, can bring that truth to me moving.
So, I am a very sentimental person. Flower of the fall, a decline of grass will let me reverie of dancing. Life, a very small detail, a scene of parting will I shed a tear.
Fortunately, I chose the text, you can off my chest, gently tell. Thank text, it gives me Feeling export.
There are books, it gave me reason to enrich life. Numerous day and night, I Shoubushijuan, a then one of the reading. Books and time to confront the in and become rich and vivid.
One after another night away again, I still sleep with. I only wish to sleep in in the absence of a clear, lingering in the books, indulge in the text, to look for, my spirit pure land.